Accountability is a word we hear a lot in leadership. But sometimes, what we call accountability is actually control.

Accountability is when we agree on the outcome, and I support you in achieving it.

Control is when I need you to do it the way I would do it, within my timeline, and I need to know exactly how you're going to do it.

We do this with our families, our friends, our colleagues, and even with ourselves.

We want to manage every detail. We want to control situations because control can make us feel safe.

But control gets you compliance and doesn't create ownership.

From a neuroscience perspective, when people feel controlled and constantly monitored, their brains can experience that environment as a threat.

Instead of feeling creative and empowered, they start thinking:

“Just tell me what to do.”

As a leader, if everyone is coming to you for the right answer, it doesn't necessarily mean they can't make decisions. It may mean you've created an environment where they don't feel trusted to make them.

Real leadership means creating clarity and trust, and being willing to let someone accomplish things differently than you would.

Are you holding people accountable, or are you having difficulty letting go of control?

Great leadership isn't about controlling people. It's about creating and empowering people who have the trust, confidence, and capabilities to lead themselves.